Saturday, November 27, 2010
Demo Reviews: Quake IV
Today we're pulling one out of the vault, as it were. Quake IV was released in 2005 for PC, and was later ported to the 360 and Mac. But, you can still download the demo on X Box Live, so that's why we're here today. I'm a big Quake fan, having played Quake II on PC back when we first got a home computer, and it was in fact the first PC game I ever finished. But enough about that, let's have a bit of background on the games themselves before we start.
Quake IV is a direct sequel to Quake II. Quakes I and III are not part of this story. The first game follows a similar story to fellow FPS (first-person-shooter) Doom, and the third entry is based heavily in multiplayer with little story. In Quake II, you follow a Marine stranded on the alien world of Stroggos. The Stroggs, a cybernetic race that uses prisoners and enemy dead to replenish and fuel it's massive war machine, have invaded Earth and you are sent as part of a counter-attack. Your character is alone throughout the game, and in the end you manage to destroy the Stroggs' security grid as well as the Strogg leader, the Makron.
Yeah, this guy.
The demo for Quake IV picks up with a human armada coming out of (warp speed/hyperspace/mass relay/etc.) at the planet Stroggos. There's a nice bit of exposition as your squad leader briefs you and outlines what happened in Quake II. Your landing ship is shot down and you spend the rest of the demo reuniting with your squad and heading out on what I assume is the first mission.
I had a lot of fun with this demo, not just because of the nostalgia factor (although familiarity with the story, enemies, etc. didn't hurt I'm sure). The graphics were very nice (for being five years old), while still having that "Quake" feel to them. As such, the enemies also got an update, while still recognizable to someone familiar with the game. Take for example the Strogg Beserker from Quake II (left) and Quake IV (right).
I also really liked how the opening cinematic for the game really sets the tone for what's to come (see it here ). It pulls no punches, and let's you know right away this is an M-rated game and it's going to hold to that rating. It's not going to shy away from all the brutal and gory bits as you wage war on the Strogg. In investigating this game I found another cinematic that shows you in unabashed and graphic detail what happens when someone gets captured by the Strogg. It may not be pretty, but it shows you what your up against and the price that all humans will pay if you fail. That is intense stuff and that's what I like to see. This game is already for adults and I like that it doesn't gloss things over, it shows you what the stakes really are. And keeping it in the first-person-perspective is a nice touch.
A difference, and I don't think it's a bad one, is having other humans in the game (at least for the duration of the demo). In Quake II you are alone, from the time you land till the end of the game. Here there are other soldiers, and medics who can heal you. This is a very interesting difference, and makes for a slightly different gameplay mindset than being a one-man army. I don't know if this persists throughout the game, but having some human interaction for at least part of it is a change I don't mind. The voice acting for the characters seems to be pretty good, especially since it seems a lot of first-person shooters have average-to-bad voice acting* (except you, Bioshock, we love you <3), and I would say Quake IV rates better than something like Turok, which was pretty good but often hit-or-miss.
But what about the weapons, you say? Well, I can only tell you about what was available in the demo, which was the blaster, the machine gun, and the shotgun. The blaster is your usual starting gun, limitless ammo, not terribly powerful, but gets the job done when you need it to. Next you have the shotgun. It fires eight rounds before reload, and is great for close targets (although a bit slow to fire and reload) but sucks at range. Finally, the trusty machine gun. This one has a forty round clip, a flashlight, and ability to use the scope to snipe. It's a jack-of-all-trades weapon that is very effective and my personal choice for early levels. Sadly, I didn't get to try out fun superguns like the hyperblaster, the railgun, or the nailgun, but I remember the hyperblaster and railgun from Quake II and I'm sure they are just as much fun this time around.
So, would I recommend this game, based on the demo? Hells yes! It's nice to have played Quake II first, so you have a better idea of what's going on, but I'm sure you can more or less put it together as you play if you haven't. In fact, there is a Collector's Edition of the game (for PC and 360) that comes with Quake II if you need it. I've read that Quake IV runs badly on the 360, with framrate issues and long load times, but none of that was present in the demo, so I don't know if that was patched or was just because it was the demo. I would still recommend this game on whatever your preferred platform. It's a fun, gory, Strogg-blasting good time, and there's nothing wrong with that. For anything familiar with the story from Quake II, this will give you a nice bit of nostalgia, especially during the opening briefing when you realize "hey, that was ME that did all those things in the last game!". So I say, go give it a try, it's lots of fun. And join me next time on Demo Reviews where I will do a more recent game, I promise. :D
The P.M.S
*I could be wrong about this of course. I don't play the war FPSs like Call of Duty so they might be great for all I know.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Demo Reviews: Gothic 4: Arcania
Hey there all, Picky Mama Scholar here with a new blog segment: Demo Reviews. In this segment, I will play demos I download from X Box Live and share my experiences for your reading pleasure. So let's dig in.
Our first game is Gothic 4: Arcania. Now I haven't played Gothics 1-3, but I do love me a good RPG so I figured I would give this one a try. This game was actually just released on Oct 12th (unless you play PS3, in which case, you will have to wait till the new year). Now then, this review is somewhat comparative between this game and Dragon Age: Origins, since the latter is kind of my "gold standard" and due to similar styles between the two. It will all make sense as we go, I promise.
Now the first thing I noticed is that my character, the hero, doesn't have a name. Or perhaps the full version gives the option to change the name, I don't know. So during my time wandering the village and talking to people, a good chunk of the people called me Shepherd. Now I get this, seeing as how that is apparently the characters job, but it's kind of weird for me to hear this as an avid Mass Effect player. So whenever someone referred to my character that way, this* is what came to mind, and that didn't help this game any. That wasn't the only reminder of another franchise in this game. At one point, I met with a man named Diego, who had apparently been teaching my character fighting and swordsmanship. Now maybe it's just me, but upon seeing this character, I immediately said aloud "is that you, Ramirez?"He doesn't have the Scottish accent, but it's still kind of weird.
The dialogue in this game left me with something to be desired. From what I have read online of reviews, playing the full game doesn't change that. In my case, what the characters were saying and what the subtitles said sometimes didn't match (hours became days at one point). As for the dialogue itself, it's seriously lacking. There are almost no dialogue options. Only twice did I find myself with two options for what to say, and I ended up saying both options in the course of the conversation. This is a major departure from RPG's like Dragon Age, Mass Effect (which I know is action/RPG) and Fallout, where many options are present.
Arcania Convseration: PC and Ivy (Sit-And-Watch)
Dragon Age: Origins-Awakening Conversation: PC and Nathaniel (Dialogue Options)
this brings me to my next point regarding Gothic 4: the voice acting. With the exception of The PC and Diego, it pretty much sucks, the witch Lyrca being the most outstanding example (as well as example of subtitles not matching spoken dialogue). Her voice acting was atrociously the most stereotypical, pointy hat, wart on nose, broom-riding, black cat owning witch voice EVAR. And it grated on the ears to listen to. Ugh. Her voice in the German version, where this game is from, is much, much better. The PC voice I actually liked a lot, it was probably the best one. Diego's voice was pretty good too, although I still think it would have been more awesome for him to talk like Sean Connery. It's not the worst I've ever heard out of my 360 (Bullet Witch and Jurassic: The Hunted take that title) but it's no where near the best (in the regions of Dragon Age, Mass Effect, Brutal Legend and Ghostbusters). Mediocre at best, we'll say.
The next thing I looked at was the graphics of this game. The landscapes are rendered gorgeously. They look awesome. The people, not so much. From what I have seen from the full game, there is improvement with the people, but they are still not nearly as nice looking as the world they inhabit. Quite frankly, I like the landscapes, but Dragon Age has the better character renders.
Arcania Landscape (Pic doesn't really do it justice)
Dragon Age Landscape
Arcania Character Render: Ivy (your girlfriend)**
Dragon Age Character Render: PC (right) and Sigrun (left)
I noticed as I played this demo that the character movements seemed clunky and slow, as were the controls. I did not find a button for running, so I was stuck with this wading-through-molasses pace for the whole thing. Combat wasn't any better. It was slow and repetitive button mashing, as I also found there to be no auto-attack. You basically hit x to attack with your weapon, and it reacts sluggishly. And you have to hit the button for every weapon swing. I could see combat in a dungeon with lots of enemies turning into marathon grind-fests of endless button mashing. Perhaps had there been better reaction time (even dinky one-handers seem quite slow in speed) it would have been better.
Finally, my biggest problem with this game: I couldn't any of the friggin' text. From the quest logs to the looting screens to even the radial menus, the text was so damn small I couldn't read a word of it. And I'm not that far away from my TV when I play. I measured. Six feet. That's how far I am when I play. I suppose this game was made with PCs or high def TVs in mind. It must be, because otherwise this game would be unplayable. It really kills the game experience when you can't see what you're suppose to do, what you're picking up, or the stats on your equipment or yourself. It was ridiculous. I noticed the text in the codexes of Mass Effect 2 were quite small, but I could still read them from where I usually sit to game without too much difficulty. In Gothic 4, it was impossible, even when very close to the TV. Even if the rest of the game had been completely phenomenal, this would still have been a huge problem.
Arcania Loot Screen***
Dragon Age Loot Screen
Arcania Quest Log
Dragon Age Quest Log/Codex
Mass Effect 2 Codex
So my final verdict? This game is meh. Granted, the full game may blow my socks off compared to the demo, but everything I have read indicates that this isn't the case. The character movement looks better and smoother and less sluggish, but the voice acting will still mostly suck and the character renders are still ugly. The demo tells you very little of the story, and in fact most blurbs on the plot are vague and hint at it being not terribly original. Now the story in Dragon Age isn't exactly the epitome of originality, but the characters and stories woven into the plot make it well worth it. As for Gothic 4, I would say a rental at best. As for me, renting it is unlikely, as I don't feel like going through a whole game (which takes 10-25 hours, depending on who you ask) unable to read anything, especially not an RPG. I'm not recommending this, unless you've played the other Gothic games, but then you would not likely need me to tell you one way or the other. It's mediocre, a rental, but not a buy. There are much better RPGs out there waiting.
Well folks, thanks for reading, and hope you join me for another Demo Review very soon.
Remember to check out our YouTube Channel, Facebook, and Flikr page (NEW! and with more pics from this review!)
Cheers!
PS: If anyone can tell me who voices the PC in Arcania, that would be awesome. He sounds familiar and I can't find an English cast list anywhere.
*I'm an exclusive FemShep player. The Cynic has played MaleShep, as I discussed in my video review of the game.
**I had to grab this pic from Google. It appears to be from the finished game.
***I sat in the same place to take all of these pictures, for consistency.
Our first game is Gothic 4: Arcania. Now I haven't played Gothics 1-3, but I do love me a good RPG so I figured I would give this one a try. This game was actually just released on Oct 12th (unless you play PS3, in which case, you will have to wait till the new year). Now then, this review is somewhat comparative between this game and Dragon Age: Origins, since the latter is kind of my "gold standard" and due to similar styles between the two. It will all make sense as we go, I promise.
Now the first thing I noticed is that my character, the hero, doesn't have a name. Or perhaps the full version gives the option to change the name, I don't know. So during my time wandering the village and talking to people, a good chunk of the people called me Shepherd. Now I get this, seeing as how that is apparently the characters job, but it's kind of weird for me to hear this as an avid Mass Effect player. So whenever someone referred to my character that way, this* is what came to mind, and that didn't help this game any. That wasn't the only reminder of another franchise in this game. At one point, I met with a man named Diego, who had apparently been teaching my character fighting and swordsmanship. Now maybe it's just me, but upon seeing this character, I immediately said aloud "is that you, Ramirez?"He doesn't have the Scottish accent, but it's still kind of weird.
The dialogue in this game left me with something to be desired. From what I have read online of reviews, playing the full game doesn't change that. In my case, what the characters were saying and what the subtitles said sometimes didn't match (hours became days at one point). As for the dialogue itself, it's seriously lacking. There are almost no dialogue options. Only twice did I find myself with two options for what to say, and I ended up saying both options in the course of the conversation. This is a major departure from RPG's like Dragon Age, Mass Effect (which I know is action/RPG) and Fallout, where many options are present.
Arcania Convseration: PC and Ivy (Sit-And-Watch)
Dragon Age: Origins-Awakening Conversation: PC and Nathaniel (Dialogue Options)
this brings me to my next point regarding Gothic 4: the voice acting. With the exception of The PC and Diego, it pretty much sucks, the witch Lyrca being the most outstanding example (as well as example of subtitles not matching spoken dialogue). Her voice acting was atrociously the most stereotypical, pointy hat, wart on nose, broom-riding, black cat owning witch voice EVAR. And it grated on the ears to listen to. Ugh. Her voice in the German version, where this game is from, is much, much better. The PC voice I actually liked a lot, it was probably the best one. Diego's voice was pretty good too, although I still think it would have been more awesome for him to talk like Sean Connery. It's not the worst I've ever heard out of my 360 (Bullet Witch and Jurassic: The Hunted take that title) but it's no where near the best (in the regions of Dragon Age, Mass Effect, Brutal Legend and Ghostbusters). Mediocre at best, we'll say.
The next thing I looked at was the graphics of this game. The landscapes are rendered gorgeously. They look awesome. The people, not so much. From what I have seen from the full game, there is improvement with the people, but they are still not nearly as nice looking as the world they inhabit. Quite frankly, I like the landscapes, but Dragon Age has the better character renders.
Arcania Landscape (Pic doesn't really do it justice)
Dragon Age Landscape
Arcania Character Render: Ivy (your girlfriend)**
Dragon Age Character Render: PC (right) and Sigrun (left)
I noticed as I played this demo that the character movements seemed clunky and slow, as were the controls. I did not find a button for running, so I was stuck with this wading-through-molasses pace for the whole thing. Combat wasn't any better. It was slow and repetitive button mashing, as I also found there to be no auto-attack. You basically hit x to attack with your weapon, and it reacts sluggishly. And you have to hit the button for every weapon swing. I could see combat in a dungeon with lots of enemies turning into marathon grind-fests of endless button mashing. Perhaps had there been better reaction time (even dinky one-handers seem quite slow in speed) it would have been better.
Finally, my biggest problem with this game: I couldn't any of the friggin' text. From the quest logs to the looting screens to even the radial menus, the text was so damn small I couldn't read a word of it. And I'm not that far away from my TV when I play. I measured. Six feet. That's how far I am when I play. I suppose this game was made with PCs or high def TVs in mind. It must be, because otherwise this game would be unplayable. It really kills the game experience when you can't see what you're suppose to do, what you're picking up, or the stats on your equipment or yourself. It was ridiculous. I noticed the text in the codexes of Mass Effect 2 were quite small, but I could still read them from where I usually sit to game without too much difficulty. In Gothic 4, it was impossible, even when very close to the TV. Even if the rest of the game had been completely phenomenal, this would still have been a huge problem.
Arcania Loot Screen***
Dragon Age Loot Screen
Arcania Quest Log
Dragon Age Quest Log/Codex
Mass Effect 2 Codex
So my final verdict? This game is meh. Granted, the full game may blow my socks off compared to the demo, but everything I have read indicates that this isn't the case. The character movement looks better and smoother and less sluggish, but the voice acting will still mostly suck and the character renders are still ugly. The demo tells you very little of the story, and in fact most blurbs on the plot are vague and hint at it being not terribly original. Now the story in Dragon Age isn't exactly the epitome of originality, but the characters and stories woven into the plot make it well worth it. As for Gothic 4, I would say a rental at best. As for me, renting it is unlikely, as I don't feel like going through a whole game (which takes 10-25 hours, depending on who you ask) unable to read anything, especially not an RPG. I'm not recommending this, unless you've played the other Gothic games, but then you would not likely need me to tell you one way or the other. It's mediocre, a rental, but not a buy. There are much better RPGs out there waiting.
Well folks, thanks for reading, and hope you join me for another Demo Review very soon.
Remember to check out our YouTube Channel, Facebook, and Flikr page (NEW! and with more pics from this review!)
Cheers!
PS: If anyone can tell me who voices the PC in Arcania, that would be awesome. He sounds familiar and I can't find an English cast list anywhere.
*I'm an exclusive FemShep player. The Cynic has played MaleShep, as I discussed in my video review of the game.
**I had to grab this pic from Google. It appears to be from the finished game.
***I sat in the same place to take all of these pictures, for consistency.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Top 7 Songs That Should Be In Guitar Hero
Seeing as how I uploaded my review for the latest entry in the series, Guitar Hero: Warriors Of Rock, last week, I began thinking of songs that I would love to see as DLC in the future. This list was really hard to narrow down and even as I type this, other songs that aren't included here are popping into my head and much like my Top 15 Simpsons Episodes, I could make many a list with honorable mentions, so here are my Top 7 Songs That Should Be In Guitar Hero. Why Top 7? Why not? Why Guitar Hero? Because GH is my personal preference when it comes to the rhythm games. Rock Band has great DLC, but after playing it again the other day, I found it to be far too picky with its scoring system. 4.5 stars on Painkiller expert bass even though I can 5 star the chart in GH: Van Halen without a problem even though they are the same fucking thing? Up yours, Rock Band.
#7: Big & Rich - Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy
Apparently Warner Music Group really likes this song and has disabled embedding for this video, so clicky if you haven't heard it already. This song is another reason why this list is specific to Guitar Hero as opposed to Rock Band because Rock Band should have ROCK music and therefore I don't think that rap, bubblegum pop & country music should be in that particular series. Guitar Hero, however, is far more lenient with that kind of thing because as long as you actually play instruments (namely the guitar), you can be in the GH series. I include this song because as far as newer country goes, this is probably one of the best I've heard in years, and the guitar solo has a very rock feel to it. The bass line would be fun to play as well.
#6: Tragically Hip - Grace Too
A great nostalgic song from a great Canadian rock band. Some of The Hip's stuff might seem mellow or downright weird, but Grace Too is just badass and I don't care what anyone else thinks. The song might be sound simple as far as guitar, drums and bass goes, but it wouldn't surprise me if much like On The Road Again, this song is more challenging than it lets on. The vocals would be one helluva challenge, though.
#5: April Wine - I Like To Rock
From one Canadian band to another. Honestly, I find April Wine to be the superior of the two, thus why this song ranks higher than Grace Too. Once the song starts, you'd have to good at strumming up and down to ensure you didn't bomb it right off the hop. I honestly don't care for the Rolling Stone bit at the end, but otherwise, this is still a kick ass song.
#4: Rammstein - Asche Zu Asche (live)
I choose the live version for three reasons:
1) I love the delay at the beginning and before the final verse, thus lengthening this already great song
2) I find it rock and metal songs crunchier in live recordings because the band is feeding off the crowd and the adrenaline rush shows in their music
3) Till Lindemann's vocal harmonization at the end sounds fucking beautiful and would be a blast to perform on vocals
#3: Fleetwood Mac - The Chain
Seriously, do I have to elaborate on this? While Go Your Own Way is a very good song in its own right, The Chain simply outdoes it. The vocals would be very challenging, the drums while not overly active are still great, and the guitar and bass at the end would be an absolute headbanging blast to rock out to. Yes, I just suggested headbanging to Fleetwood Mac and I don't feel ashamed of it at all.
#2: Metallica - Harvester Of Sorrow
Yeah yeah, I know damn well that Metallica has their own Guitar Hero game (I've only been playing the hell out of it for the last year and a half) and many of you will probably think that they have no business being on this list. Well, Harvester Of Sorrow is here to show you that while GH:M may have had some of their best work, it didn't include ALL of their best work. The awesome beginning, James Hetfield's snarling vocals, the somewhat haunting solo, the fact that you just can't help but bang your head along to this song, seriously, why in the hell was this song excluded from GH:M?!
#1: Judas Priest - Demonizer
The most crushing and relentless song from Priest's 2005 album Angel Of Retribution (which is really saying something), Demonizer would easily be the most challenging song on this list and very worthy of the number one spot on this list. The bassist would have to be a very fast strummer to keep up, as would the drummer if playing on the Expert+ difficulty, like playing the chorus to Painkiller for 4:38. The guitars in this song would be equally as challenging because most Judas Priest songs are. The vocals would be a nightmare for this song, again, because it's fucking Judas Priest. You can't deny how awesome this song would be to have in your in game setlist.
-The Cynic
#7: Big & Rich - Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy
Apparently Warner Music Group really likes this song and has disabled embedding for this video, so clicky if you haven't heard it already. This song is another reason why this list is specific to Guitar Hero as opposed to Rock Band because Rock Band should have ROCK music and therefore I don't think that rap, bubblegum pop & country music should be in that particular series. Guitar Hero, however, is far more lenient with that kind of thing because as long as you actually play instruments (namely the guitar), you can be in the GH series. I include this song because as far as newer country goes, this is probably one of the best I've heard in years, and the guitar solo has a very rock feel to it. The bass line would be fun to play as well.
#6: Tragically Hip - Grace Too
A great nostalgic song from a great Canadian rock band. Some of The Hip's stuff might seem mellow or downright weird, but Grace Too is just badass and I don't care what anyone else thinks. The song might be sound simple as far as guitar, drums and bass goes, but it wouldn't surprise me if much like On The Road Again, this song is more challenging than it lets on. The vocals would be one helluva challenge, though.
#5: April Wine - I Like To Rock
From one Canadian band to another. Honestly, I find April Wine to be the superior of the two, thus why this song ranks higher than Grace Too. Once the song starts, you'd have to good at strumming up and down to ensure you didn't bomb it right off the hop. I honestly don't care for the Rolling Stone bit at the end, but otherwise, this is still a kick ass song.
#4: Rammstein - Asche Zu Asche (live)
I choose the live version for three reasons:
1) I love the delay at the beginning and before the final verse, thus lengthening this already great song
2) I find it rock and metal songs crunchier in live recordings because the band is feeding off the crowd and the adrenaline rush shows in their music
3) Till Lindemann's vocal harmonization at the end sounds fucking beautiful and would be a blast to perform on vocals
#3: Fleetwood Mac - The Chain
Seriously, do I have to elaborate on this? While Go Your Own Way is a very good song in its own right, The Chain simply outdoes it. The vocals would be very challenging, the drums while not overly active are still great, and the guitar and bass at the end would be an absolute headbanging blast to rock out to. Yes, I just suggested headbanging to Fleetwood Mac and I don't feel ashamed of it at all.
#2: Metallica - Harvester Of Sorrow
Yeah yeah, I know damn well that Metallica has their own Guitar Hero game (I've only been playing the hell out of it for the last year and a half) and many of you will probably think that they have no business being on this list. Well, Harvester Of Sorrow is here to show you that while GH:M may have had some of their best work, it didn't include ALL of their best work. The awesome beginning, James Hetfield's snarling vocals, the somewhat haunting solo, the fact that you just can't help but bang your head along to this song, seriously, why in the hell was this song excluded from GH:M?!
#1: Judas Priest - Demonizer
The most crushing and relentless song from Priest's 2005 album Angel Of Retribution (which is really saying something), Demonizer would easily be the most challenging song on this list and very worthy of the number one spot on this list. The bassist would have to be a very fast strummer to keep up, as would the drummer if playing on the Expert+ difficulty, like playing the chorus to Painkiller for 4:38. The guitars in this song would be equally as challenging because most Judas Priest songs are. The vocals would be a nightmare for this song, again, because it's fucking Judas Priest. You can't deny how awesome this song would be to have in your in game setlist.
-The Cynic
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Top 6 Movie Music Moments
Welcome to a new list! Hurray! Anyways, today we are going to be looking at my top 6 (more like...9) musical moments in movies. Now just to put it out there, I don't watch musicals generally, so you won't see any of the well-known things on here like Mama Mia! or Rent or Hairspray or Cats (was that a movie? I don't think so but I could be wrong) or anything like that. I also attempted not to fill the list with Disney either, as that would be too easy. So sit back and enjoy Top 6 Musical Moments (done the hard way).
Honorable Mention: Sweet Transvestite- The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)
Now this gets an honorable mention because I haven't actually sat down and watched the entire thing. I know, my bad. I will get around to it one of these days. You can't deny that Tim Curry OWNS this. The singing is fabulous, he walks in those heels better than I could, and DAMN he's not some nice legs! That costume takes some balls to wear, but he struts about like it's nothing. Dude, you are awesome.
# 6. Winnie the Pooh Theme Song- The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (1977)
(skip to 2:00)
Maybe it's because I loved this as a kid, maybe it's because I hear it 5 times a day because MY kid loves it, I don't know. What I do know, is this song just fills me with nostalgia. I love this version of Winnie the Pooh. This was the film I grew up with, and with so many good musical numbers it was hard to pick just one (Tigger Song, anyone?). All of these songs are just happy and whimsical and fun, you can't help but hum along.
5. Robin Hood- Shrek (2001)
Shrek is a movie you can enjoy as both a kid and an adult. In this scene, Robin Hood attempts to rescue Fiona from Shrek, and breaks out in this little ditty to introduce himself. And in this song you can definitely see what I mean by child and adult humor. It's just so ridiculously fun, and adds to a great movie.
4. Opening Scene- xXx (2002)
This is the first three and a half minutes of the film xXx. It's also the best part of the movie. Seriously. The rest is kinda meh. Which sucks considering the damn thing starts at a friggin' Rammstein concert. The scene is actually pretty cool, with Feuer Frei! playing throughout and not a bad set up to the film. Too bad the rest of it sucks. Oh well, at least the opening scene is made of awesome.
3. Rawhide- Blues Brothers (1980)
Blues Brothers is a great musical, arguably one of the best. With the likes of Ray Charles, Aretha Franklin, and James Brown in the film, it was very hard to choose a song. This one stands out and amuses me because it's a situation of "oh shit, we need a song to play that these people will like.... ummm... Rawhide! Yeah!". And Jake's posture and attitude through the song is just priceless.
2. Playing With the Big Boys Now & Plagues- The Price of Egypt (1998)
Skip to about 3:45
For those of you who haven't seen this, The Prince of Egypt is a DreamWorks film about the story of Moses, his life in Egypt, the Plagues, and the Exodus. It's also a very good movie, and if you haven't seen it, you should. These two songs from the film are intense, seriously. In Playing with the Big Boys Now, two of Pharaoh's priests are trying to convince Moses of how much more powerful they are than him, because of huge Egyptian pantheon. Plagues is just that, a song sung between Moses and Pharaoh as the plagues ravage Egypt. Definitely memorable.
1. Be Prepared- The Lion King (1994) and Poor Unfortunate Souls- The Little Mermaid ((1989)
Okay, so I tried my hardest NOT to fill this list with Disney stuff. this is as far as I could narrow it down. And I have to ask, why is it the Disney villains always have the coolest songs? The Little Mermaid was not my favorite of the Disney movies, but Poor Unfortunate Souls is one hell of a song. And of course, Be Prepared, from the Lion King. Jeremy Irons/Jim Cummings (can you tell where they switch off? Cause I can't) sing what is probably my most memorable song from one of my favorite Disney movies. As far as villains go, Scar and Ursula are definitely two of the coolest.
Well, I hope you all enjoyed the list. See you folks again soon.
Stay classy
Picky Mama Scholar
Honorable Mention: Sweet Transvestite- The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)
Now this gets an honorable mention because I haven't actually sat down and watched the entire thing. I know, my bad. I will get around to it one of these days. You can't deny that Tim Curry OWNS this. The singing is fabulous, he walks in those heels better than I could, and DAMN he's not some nice legs! That costume takes some balls to wear, but he struts about like it's nothing. Dude, you are awesome.
# 6. Winnie the Pooh Theme Song- The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (1977)
(skip to 2:00)
Maybe it's because I loved this as a kid, maybe it's because I hear it 5 times a day because MY kid loves it, I don't know. What I do know, is this song just fills me with nostalgia. I love this version of Winnie the Pooh. This was the film I grew up with, and with so many good musical numbers it was hard to pick just one (Tigger Song, anyone?). All of these songs are just happy and whimsical and fun, you can't help but hum along.
5. Robin Hood- Shrek (2001)
Shrek is a movie you can enjoy as both a kid and an adult. In this scene, Robin Hood attempts to rescue Fiona from Shrek, and breaks out in this little ditty to introduce himself. And in this song you can definitely see what I mean by child and adult humor. It's just so ridiculously fun, and adds to a great movie.
4. Opening Scene- xXx (2002)
This is the first three and a half minutes of the film xXx. It's also the best part of the movie. Seriously. The rest is kinda meh. Which sucks considering the damn thing starts at a friggin' Rammstein concert. The scene is actually pretty cool, with Feuer Frei! playing throughout and not a bad set up to the film. Too bad the rest of it sucks. Oh well, at least the opening scene is made of awesome.
3. Rawhide- Blues Brothers (1980)
Blues Brothers is a great musical, arguably one of the best. With the likes of Ray Charles, Aretha Franklin, and James Brown in the film, it was very hard to choose a song. This one stands out and amuses me because it's a situation of "oh shit, we need a song to play that these people will like.... ummm... Rawhide! Yeah!". And Jake's posture and attitude through the song is just priceless.
2. Playing With the Big Boys Now & Plagues- The Price of Egypt (1998)
Skip to about 3:45
For those of you who haven't seen this, The Prince of Egypt is a DreamWorks film about the story of Moses, his life in Egypt, the Plagues, and the Exodus. It's also a very good movie, and if you haven't seen it, you should. These two songs from the film are intense, seriously. In Playing with the Big Boys Now, two of Pharaoh's priests are trying to convince Moses of how much more powerful they are than him, because of huge Egyptian pantheon. Plagues is just that, a song sung between Moses and Pharaoh as the plagues ravage Egypt. Definitely memorable.
1. Be Prepared- The Lion King (1994) and Poor Unfortunate Souls- The Little Mermaid ((1989)
Okay, so I tried my hardest NOT to fill this list with Disney stuff. this is as far as I could narrow it down. And I have to ask, why is it the Disney villains always have the coolest songs? The Little Mermaid was not my favorite of the Disney movies, but Poor Unfortunate Souls is one hell of a song. And of course, Be Prepared, from the Lion King. Jeremy Irons/Jim Cummings (can you tell where they switch off? Cause I can't) sing what is probably my most memorable song from one of my favorite Disney movies. As far as villains go, Scar and Ursula are definitely two of the coolest.
Well, I hope you all enjoyed the list. See you folks again soon.
Stay classy
Picky Mama Scholar
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Friday, November 5, 2010
Quick Blurb Review: Toy Story 3
It's been 15 years since the first Toy Story film hit theatres and introduced the mainstream audience to Pixar Animation Studios. A very successful sequel, Toy Story 2, hit theatres in 1999 and is actually considered by many to be superior to the first, a true rarity in sequels. Today, we're looking at the latest, and final, addition to the series, Toy Story 3.
Toy Story 3 follows Woody (Tom Hanks), Buzz Lightyear (Tim Allen) and most of the familiar faces from the first two films as they see that Andy has grown up and is off to college. Andy originally intends for them to go into the attic, but because of a mixup, they end up getting donated to a local daycare centre. The toys there are very welcoming, including Barbie's counterpart Ken (voiced by Michael Keaton) and a stuffed bear named Lotso (Ned Beatty). The rest of the gang thinks that the place is a paradise, but Woody is adamant that they get back to Andy's place. Once the toys see what life at daycare is really like, they begin to wonder just how truly playful their new roommates are.
Let's take a moment to talk about the animation. The animation is insanely detailed and is easily Pixar's best work. There are xBox games with less details to environment than this movie, it's insane! The characters, organic or synthetic, move so fluently and the animation is damn near perfect that I have to take my hat off to Pixar for truly outdoing themselves here.
The casting is wonderful, as per usual with Toy Story. The original gang (what's left of them, anyway) easily fit back into the character shoes they last stepped in 11 years ago and the new characters do not feel like they've been forced in. Much like the animation, the style of how the characters react and play off one another is amazing. The only other thing I have to say about this part here, and I know that this is going to sound really gay, but I wanted to see more Ken. He stole every scene he was in.
Now, with trying to keep this review as spoiler free as possible (if you are like me and didn't catch the film in the theatres), let's talk about the story, or more so, the underlying message. The first film was about accepting change while the second was about deciding which was more worthwhile: wealth or family. Toy Story 3 is about saying goodbye, to an extent. The toys are having to accept that Andy doesn't want to play with them anymore, not because he doesn't care, but because he's grown up. This may sound fairly harmless but it takes a darker tone as the film progresses and in its own little way, is telling the audience to say goodbye to this franchise (Pixar has confirmed they are NOT planning a Toy Story 4, but maybe some animation shorts featuring the characters) as most of the fans of the original are adults now. I'm fine with having this film being the last Toy Story, but something about the dark tone didn't sit right with me. Maybe it's because I collect toys (not from this franchise, mind you), but perhaps some of us want to stay a little kid with some aspects of their lives and there's parts of this movie that are basically smacking you on the back of your head and saying, "STOPPIT!"
Is this movie still enjoyable? Absolutely. Does it have laughs? Yes, a lot, and only one of them being a poop joke (and an actually fairly decent one at that). Would I recommend it? Yeah, but I do have a message for those who have been with this series from the beginning: it's very dark and emotional (one scene in the third act will require tissues). Younger fans of the franchise may not be affected as much by the depth of the story, but those who have been attached to these characters for 15 years will be. This whole bit about Toy Story 3 trying to be darker and subliminally telling you to say goodbye to your childhood originally made my nose wrinkle a bit and would've made me think less of this movie, but when I stopped and realized that movie about a cowboy doll and a spaceman action figure elicited that kind of reaction from me, it dawned on me that this was a powerful film and was obviously doing something right.
Is Toy Story 3 the best of the series? Maybe, maybe not. I guess it all depends on what you're looking for. If you want more kid-orientated entertainment, then no. However, if you're wanting something that kids and adults can enjoy on an equal level, this might be the movie for you. If you haven't seen it yet, look into it and see the closing chapter to Toy Story.
-The Cynic
Monday, November 1, 2010
Top 7 Nostalgic Comedies
Well, it's no secret that I fucking love movies. Being a child of pop culture, that comes with the territory, and if there's nothing else we love, it's a movie that can tickle our hearts and make us have a good laugh, taking our minds off of the everyday bullshit that goes on in our lives. Since I'm feeling reflective today, we're gonna look back at The Cynic's Top 7 Nostalgic Comedies. Why Top 7? Why not?
Honorable Mention: Hot Shots
This movie is limited to an honorable mention because while I did love it as a kid, I watched it again a few years back and was heartbroken to see that it wasn't funny anymore but just...stupid. That said, I just can't deny how many laughs it got out of me until I was 20. Perhaps the over-saturation of parody movies over the last decade ruined Hot Shots for me, or maybe it was always this stupid and I didn't realize it.
#7: Men In Black
Oh, the days prior to Men In Black II. The first MIB had great characters, wonderfully humorous jokes and a fairly short runtime so the film didn't overstay its welcome. Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith play so well off of each other in this one and Vincent D'Onofrio is such an entertaining villain to watch.
#6: Ernest Goes To Jail
I'm pretty sure my brother still has the VHS of this kicking around. This was easily my favorite of the Ernest films and one of my overall favorites as a kid. It turns out that there's a guy in a local jail who looks exactly like Ernest (Jim Varney). While visiting the jail as part of his jury duty, the lookalike knocks out Ernest and trades their wardrobes so that now Ernest is the one on death row. It's been a while since I've seen this movie, so it'd be interesting to see if it still holds up after all these years.
#5: Ace Ventura - The Series
I couldn't decide which one I like more. This was the movie that introduced me to Jim Carrey and with the hi jinx that the first film had as well as a successful amount of laughs, it was no surprise that a sequel came along that kept the laughs rolling. I think my favorite part is when Ace is inspecting the Miami Dolphins player's rings the most difficult ways imaginable while Aerosmith's "Line Up" plays along. The cartoon series that followed wasn't too bad either.
#4: National Lampoon's Animal House
Any list about best comedies ever made needs to have this film on it. There's so many things that I love about this movie. The hazing rituals, Donald Sutherland getting baked with his students, John Belushi's overall presence, accidentally killing one of the faculty member's horses (no word of a lie, I almost pissed my pants I was laughing so hard), the list goes on. Considered by many to be the greatest education-themed comedy ever made.
#3: The Blues Brothers
Hey everyone! A move based on an SNL skit that doesn't suck ass! Quite possibly the greatest musical ever made, this vulgar comedy is a tale of holy redemption as Jake & Elwood Blues (John Belushi & Dan Aykroyd) are on a mission from God to prevent their old orphanage from being closed down. As you watch this movie, I want you to keep in mind that all the carnage shown starts by running a yellow light. Can't help but wonder how many drivers behaved more on the road after seeing this movie.
#2: The Grumpy Old Men Series
This series steals the #2 spot from The Blues Brothers only by having a sequel that holds up to the first one. My parents/grandparents may know the legendary pairing of Jack Lemon & Walter Matthau from The Odd Couple, but I know their chemistry from these films. These two play off each other so well that they were cast in other films as similar characters in Out To Sea and it renewed interest in their past pairing, giving us The Odd Couple II. The inclusion of Burgess Meridith as Jack Lemon's dad just adds comedic gold that is already running rampant in this series.
#1: Ghostbusters
Do I really have to explain this? I've said it time and time again, but Ghostbusters is the perfect comedy. It's played for laughs, but there's still elements of action, romance and horror within. This movie is a mixed bag of genres and Goddamn, do I love this movie. The writing is sharp, the movie is brilliantly casted, the actors play so well off of each other & even though this movie came out 26 years ago, I still laugh my ass off every time I watch this movie. This movie is a must watch on any occasion. Halloween? Christmas? Whacking Day? Watch Ghostbusters.
Honorable Mention: Hot Shots
This movie is limited to an honorable mention because while I did love it as a kid, I watched it again a few years back and was heartbroken to see that it wasn't funny anymore but just...stupid. That said, I just can't deny how many laughs it got out of me until I was 20. Perhaps the over-saturation of parody movies over the last decade ruined Hot Shots for me, or maybe it was always this stupid and I didn't realize it.
#7: Men In Black
Oh, the days prior to Men In Black II. The first MIB had great characters, wonderfully humorous jokes and a fairly short runtime so the film didn't overstay its welcome. Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith play so well off of each other in this one and Vincent D'Onofrio is such an entertaining villain to watch.
#6: Ernest Goes To Jail
I'm pretty sure my brother still has the VHS of this kicking around. This was easily my favorite of the Ernest films and one of my overall favorites as a kid. It turns out that there's a guy in a local jail who looks exactly like Ernest (Jim Varney). While visiting the jail as part of his jury duty, the lookalike knocks out Ernest and trades their wardrobes so that now Ernest is the one on death row. It's been a while since I've seen this movie, so it'd be interesting to see if it still holds up after all these years.
#5: Ace Ventura - The Series
I couldn't decide which one I like more. This was the movie that introduced me to Jim Carrey and with the hi jinx that the first film had as well as a successful amount of laughs, it was no surprise that a sequel came along that kept the laughs rolling. I think my favorite part is when Ace is inspecting the Miami Dolphins player's rings the most difficult ways imaginable while Aerosmith's "Line Up" plays along. The cartoon series that followed wasn't too bad either.
#4: National Lampoon's Animal House
Any list about best comedies ever made needs to have this film on it. There's so many things that I love about this movie. The hazing rituals, Donald Sutherland getting baked with his students, John Belushi's overall presence, accidentally killing one of the faculty member's horses (no word of a lie, I almost pissed my pants I was laughing so hard), the list goes on. Considered by many to be the greatest education-themed comedy ever made.
#3: The Blues Brothers
Hey everyone! A move based on an SNL skit that doesn't suck ass! Quite possibly the greatest musical ever made, this vulgar comedy is a tale of holy redemption as Jake & Elwood Blues (John Belushi & Dan Aykroyd) are on a mission from God to prevent their old orphanage from being closed down. As you watch this movie, I want you to keep in mind that all the carnage shown starts by running a yellow light. Can't help but wonder how many drivers behaved more on the road after seeing this movie.
#2: The Grumpy Old Men Series
This series steals the #2 spot from The Blues Brothers only by having a sequel that holds up to the first one. My parents/grandparents may know the legendary pairing of Jack Lemon & Walter Matthau from The Odd Couple, but I know their chemistry from these films. These two play off each other so well that they were cast in other films as similar characters in Out To Sea and it renewed interest in their past pairing, giving us The Odd Couple II. The inclusion of Burgess Meridith as Jack Lemon's dad just adds comedic gold that is already running rampant in this series.
#1: Ghostbusters
Do I really have to explain this? I've said it time and time again, but Ghostbusters is the perfect comedy. It's played for laughs, but there's still elements of action, romance and horror within. This movie is a mixed bag of genres and Goddamn, do I love this movie. The writing is sharp, the movie is brilliantly casted, the actors play so well off of each other & even though this movie came out 26 years ago, I still laugh my ass off every time I watch this movie. This movie is a must watch on any occasion. Halloween? Christmas? Whacking Day? Watch Ghostbusters.
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